Love Headache
Many have experienced deceit in love and some say i give up but i tell you , if you give up on love you are indirectly given up on yourself because by the time you experience true love, you will only discover you just got the right flavour that spice up your life. Many may not understand but few who have gone down this path will connect with what i will be sharing in this piece.
Love is not always what it seems and it is far beyond just a word, it is an act because love is a verb. I have had couple of disappointments and also, i have disappointed individuals who hope i had loved and returned their affections but i didn’t. God made us unique and it is often believed that women are more emotional than men who are more logical in nature.
As an emotional being, when i love, i do so with the whole of my being, this may sound as a weakness but that is what defines me. I don’t know if you’ve loved someone and somehow a part of you desire the person to become a part of your everyday life and success story but, the person with whom you thought you share
mutual emotions with has an entirely different intent from yours. It is sad and hurting, trust me i understand that feeling.
A man professes love to a woman and somehow along the way they started an affair with each other and then the woman got pregnant. This may sound as a familiar story but hold on and stick with me.
Important questions that should arise ideally from the start of the relationship begins to arise from that moment; what are the future plans? Are we getting married? And, more mind — blogging questions eats deep into the heart. Guess what? More often than not, the man approaches the lady, looks straight into her eyes and say and i quote “ you are not in my future, so no marriage between us. However, I’ll take responsibility of my child”. His words were acidic the lady narrated. Such cauterization is laced maladour, mephitis and maliciousness. Sadly, this is now the new societal norm
Yes i got pregnant. However, people should tie the nuptial knot as a result of love emanating from the conviction of the soul an not necessarily because of the pregnancy.
But then, i ask ; Do you consider taking financial responsibility enough? What about the child growing up without a daddy figure in his life? Would you prefer to be seen as visiting daddy? What happens if the child asks of us, what should i tell him? Shall i tell him of the pain i endured for love sake? Should i elucidate how you thought the child was a mistake? Or even the social misconception about my person? What should i say or do when the times comes?
Those moments were heartbreaking but i made the decision to have my baby no matter what, she said. Right that moment, my biggest fear was losing this one person i love and was going to have our baby soon, the least i needed was more than just his financial assistance.
She affirmed that all i need to do is to manage my emotions and fight my fears, she concluded that from all indication there’s no future with the gentleman. Accepting that, she reassured herself to stay focus on how to nurture and care for her baby. She added there was nothing i could do, i can’t force him to see me fit into his ideal woman knowing fully that i am worth more than that, even though i made mistake but my mistakes does not define me nor the baby nor my future, it just reveals my weakness. The mistake is the event (sex) that took place and not me nor the baby.
Dear lovers, let us understand love, get it right and do it right. Our actions and inactions has effects on people we sometimes claim to love. I will drop my pen by quoting Joshua Harris.
“ just because lips have met doesn’t mean hearts have joined” . “ Intimacy without commitment is defrauding”.
